You know that popular male performer with the girly name?

No, not Stacey Keach. "Nelly."

"Nelly" is the one who always wears the bandage on his face even though he does not have a boo-boo. Perhaps he wears it to distract attention from the rest of his features, which are, frankly, horrific. He is not so much ugly as disfigured.

One of the film clips "Nelly" uses to promote one of his recordings features a large and enthusiastic gathering of chesty babes at a nightclub. The chesty babes all dance happily and sweatily, while "Nelly" suggests that they all take off their clothes on account of the heat.

It is really a super great film clip.

In the middle of the clip, the gentleman playing the records in the nightclub stops the music in order to point out a safety hazard.

"The roof," he says, "is on fire." He points to flames snaking across the ceiling.

Ah, we think, thus the heat.

The chesty babes remain enthusiastic. They chant eagerly:

The roof! The roof! The roof is on fire! The roof! The roof! The roof is on fire! The roof! The roof! The roof is on fire!

Nonplussed but resigned, the gentleman gives up on his warnings and puts the records back on. The chesty babes begin their disrobings.

So, on with that simple question.

Now that recent events have made it clear that enflamed nightclubs are deadlier than they are titillating, do you think they're going to be showing that clip on TV anymore?

Personally I hope so. Taking off all your clothes is still a pretty good thing.

Posted by Bret at February 21, 2003 03:10 PM